Shadi & Addy: Ghostbusters Extraordanaire

Posted on Thu Jun 25th, 2020 @ 1:59am by Lieutenant JG Addison Wheeler & Lieutenant Commander Shadi Zatra

1,448 words; about a 7 minute read

Mission: S2:1: Good Will Gunboat Tour
Location: Main Engineering
Timeline: MD27 02.30

Addy was...well, she was where she usually was.

Sticking out of an open access hatch along the floor of some area that needed repairing. She couldn't really see what was going on outside, although she could hear. If she was listening. She wasn't really listening very well, because she was focused. She wasn't really focused on fixing anything because, truth be told, nothing in this hatch really needed fixing.

Except her brain.

She lay on her back, staring at the top of the tube with a spanner sitting on her forehead. She liked the cold touch of it and the weight helped her think as she tried, desperately, to figure out what the hell happened. How had she been shackled to the CEO? That was, like, notoriety, which she didn't just not seek but actively avoided.

What time would she have to mentally plan her creations if people, you know, noticed her...

"Lieutenant Addison!" Shadi called out. A loud sniff came through the air. "Are you hiding?" More sniffs. A feral growl. And then, suddenly, a scaly face popped into Addy's field of vision. "Found you! I would take a turn, except there'sss no time. Come out. Or, better yet, I'll slide in..." And she did just that, slithering right up next to Addy. "That's better. Now, where was I? Oh yes! I will be on the bridge for our triumphal entry to the Cassstaul system, which means you will be in charge of Engineering. Are you ready for this?"

Well, one thing Addison sure as hell wasn't ready for was to be smooshed into the side of an access tube with the scaly chief of engineering! Oh, what had her life become?! Her amber-colored eyes were side as she stared at the other woman. "What?" she began, somewhat dumbly. But really, she wasn't dumb. Just easily distracted. By, you know, everything. "Oh. In charge of engineering? What--" She stopped. Right. She'd been pressganged into service. "I guess so?"

"No guessing," Shadi said. "Guessing implies failure. You must be in it to win it." She slithered back out of the tube and pounced onto the deck, coming up in a roll to an upright position. "Are you in it, Lieutenant Addison? On your feet if you are!"

Addy suddenly had a flashback to one of those ridiculously over-happy students at the academy that wanted everyone to be, like, cheerleader about everything all the time. She hadn't done well with them...although they hadn't been giant lizards. Did that make a difference? She wasn't sure, and she paused to consider it before she caught up to herself and realized that would probably be a bad idea. The commander would probably pull her out by a foot...

So, she shimmied out from the console and got to her feet. Her expression was still uncertain, but she was on her feet, so that was good, right? "Yeah... I, ah, in it to win it." She paused. "What exactly am I winning, Commander?"

"Glory! Honor! Sssurvival!" Shadi beheld her scaly fist held up in reverence to the Blood Goddess. "Regard me! Do as I do!"

"Uh..." Addy began, watching the CEO with a head tilted curiously--like an animal might when another creature acted bizarre. She couldn't understand why on Luna she'd want to do this, but there was no harm either. She put her fist in the air, comparing both to make sure the position was emulated correctly, then went, "Glory. Honor... What was that other one?" She drifted off for just a moment. "Survival!" That was a big one down here.

Shadi shook her head. "No, you must find your own values. You are free to follow mine until you do though. At least you can pose properly." At that, Shadi smacked her hand. "Make a tighter fist, otherwise you'll break it. Are you taking notes?"

Addy's brow knit. "How am I supposed to be taking notes when I've got my hand up like this?"

"Spirit notes, of course!" Shadi gave a tisk of disapproval. "A Warrior needs not knowledge when they carry honor within. Would you like to spar? No, no, there isn't time. Maybe you can recite the song of your people instead! Yes, that will do."

Sing the song of her... What the hell? Addy blinked at her superior officer for a moment before singing the first thing that came to mind...probably because she'd just been watching the holo files of the long-ago show. Since her fist was still in the air, she kept it that way and started singing in an Earth language. Singing wasn't her strong suit, but she started getting into it and pumped her fist a few times while she heard the "girl power" translation in her head...

The Universal Translator failed to translate the nuances of the lyrical melody, which left Shadi confused. "What the famine was that shit?!" Shadi shook her head in a hissing fit. "No, no, no! That won't work. I'll teach you one of our songs later. For now, let's ssskip to the anointing. Take a knee."

"What was wrong with me song?" Addison asked before she could stop herself, frowning a little in slight offense, but then the rest of Shadi's words caught up with her and she blinked. "Take a knee? Whatever for?" she began then stopped and shook her head a little. "Okay, sir..." She had no idea what in the hell was going on, but there had to be some reason, right? She lowered herself to one knee. The word "anointing" had, in all honesty, sailed right over her head, leaving confusion trailing in its wake and sprinkling on her like fairy dust. Greenish, scaly fairy dust...

Shadi coughed. It was dry at first, but a viscous sound accompanied the next one. Soon, she was hacking so hard that she fell to her double-jointed knees. Once she was down on all fours, however, she finally chucked out the object lodged deep inside her. A short rod slowly worked its way out of her throat and out of her mouth onto the floor.

"Ah, yes..." Shadi said, heaving deep breaths. "This... is my family spear..." Picking it up, she swung it in a figure eight pattern which activated the telescopic function and tripled its length. A press of a button made the spearhead pop out and lock into place. Holding it aloft, Shadi declare, "With this spear, I shall anoint you as a Warrior of the Brood and a Blood Cleric of the Goddess! May you feast on the marrow of all who oppose you."

Addison's amber eyes were at risk of stretching right the hell off her dark-toned face as she watched her CEO...eject...a physical object from her gut, was it? She really didn't know what to think about that. Spear. Got that. Warrior? Blood Cleric? WTF?! Addy just kept staring. "Uh... Okay."

"The marrow is the sweetest part," Shadi whispered before clearing her throat to declare a most solemn announcement. Things must be done properly. "With this holy weapon won at the dismemberment of my fellow broodmates, I name thee an honorary agent and bloodletter of the Ragolar Brood." She then tapped Addy on both shoulders with the spear shaft. It stilled dripped with her visceral fluids. "Bear witness, all ye bloodhounds and bugaboos, all ghosts and ghouls, all deities and devas, all departed spirits of glorious ancestors and all unfertilized seed of unborn progeny, the ascent of another champion of the Ragolar Blood Goddess!"

You know, as absolutely [expletives deleted] weird as this was, something even weirder rose up in Addison's chest. Like...a sense of something that she couldn't recall ever feeling... What was it. She couldn't tell. It was an emotion, which are the weirdest things of all, really. A sense of...belonging? "I'll...serve well..." she fumbled the words out even as she was able to ignore the visceral fluids (a miracle, really) and still tried to understand her feelings (a vain effort, really).

"I know you will," Shadi said as she clapped Addy on the back hard enough to make her spit. "Or else." She began folding up the spear back into its compacted state. "Now I have to get to the bridge, so I'm going to leave you in charge down here. Goddess willing, you'll be ready. But first..." Shadi unhinged her jawbone and let it dangle freely. "Ah 'ave oo 'oot eye shear ack ere eh 'oes!" And then, very carefully, she reinserted the collapsed spear shaft down her gullet.

 

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